


set me down in your warm arms

by NoStringsOnMe



Series: instax [3]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Break Up, Canon Universe, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Implied Sexual Content, Marauders Era (Harry Potter), Snowed In
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-26
Updated: 2019-11-26
Packaged: 2021-02-26 18:27:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,605
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21573034
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NoStringsOnMe/pseuds/NoStringsOnMe
Summary: "The snow had been romantic the night before with the flurries gathering in the corners of the window panes and twirling against the inky night. In the harsh morning light, it wasn’t as cute. The snow was six feet deep and impassable. Even with magic, it would be a fool’s errand to try and make their way back down the hillside to the castle..."Stuck in a cabin and trapped by six feet of snow? Whatever will Lily and Narcissa do?
Relationships: Narcissa Black Malfoy/Lily Evans Potter
Series: instax [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1693111
Comments: 12
Kudos: 28





	set me down in your warm arms

**December 1976**

Normally, Lily Evans loved the snow. Adored it even. She loved few things more than stepping out on a fresh, crisp and untouched snowy blanket. She loved the crunch and crackle of it as she trudged through the Hogwarts grounds. She loved the way snowflakes would gather on her cheeks and eyelashes and get stuck in her hair, the delicious chill as they came into contact with the heat of her skin. Yes, Lily Evans loved the snow but right at this very moment, she hated it.

She should have never come. Never agreed to this nonsense. They had agreed on a clean break. That was what was best. Saying goodbye the first time had been hard enough, and the second time, and the third. What was she doing coming back again? It shattered her heart each and every time but each and every time she saw those star bright eyes her resolve weakened and she found herself back here. 

One last time, she’d said. One last time and then they’d be apart, she’d said. For old time’s sake, she’d said. Humour me, she’d said. 

Well, she’d only gone and fucking done it, humoured her--amongst other things--and now she was stuck here. 

The snow had been romantic the night before with the flurries gathering in the corners of the window panes and tw irling against the inky night. In the harsh morning light, it wasn’t as cute. The snow was six feet deep and impassable. Even with magic, it would be a fool’s errand to try and make their way back down the hillside to the castle.

She had spent the last fifteen minutes stalking back and forth across the open living area trying to work out what to do. If she could, she would have apparated back to the castle but since the hunting lodge they were holed up in was technically still on Hogwarts grounds, that was impossible. It was also technically illegal since she wasn’t of age yet but that was of little importance. 

With a deep sigh, Lily flopped down onto the sofa and glared at the smouldering remains of the fire. They were stuck here.

"Lily?" came Narcissa's voice on the stair. "Why is it so cold in here?"   
  
Her attempts to clear a path from the front door had sapped all warmth from the lodge and a biting air now circulated. Lily pointed her wand at the fire grate.   
  
"Incendio," she muttered dully and jolly flames shot up where only smouldering embers had been before. She fed the fire more logs to keep it going and soon the room was filled with a pleasant crackle and the soft, sharp scent of wood smoke.    
  
Narcissa sat down next to Lily and fixed her with a keen gaze. This was Lily's favourite Narcissa. The Narcissa with tousled hair and sleep heavy eyes. The Narcissa that wore oversized cardigans and jumpers over the scraps of silk and lace she called nighties. The Narcissa that had left her cool mask at the door and dulled her sharp edges. The Narcissa that let herself be soft, vulnerable.    
  
"Why are you still here?" she asked, voice barely more than a whisper. She kept her hands to herself but Lily could see the barely contained desire to reach out in the way she worried at her jumper cuffs. "After everything you said last night, I thought you'd be gone by first light."   
  
"Not for want of trying," she sighed and motioned towards the window. "Snowed in. There'll be no getting down to the castle for who knows how long."    
  
A slight frown pulled at Narcissa's delicate brows and she pursed her lips into a worried bow as she pushed off the sofa to see the wintery scene that lay just beyond their cosy confines. Lily watched her move, open and unashamed; there was nobody here, she had no need to avert her gaze and pretend the girl before her was anything less than beautiful. Narcissa moved with a dancer's grace and the firelight danced in pale orange shadows across her skin.    
  
It wasn't quite the same as the previous evening when they had lain together in front of the fire, but Lily still longed to reach out and trace the shadowy dance’s path with the tip of her finger. The corner of her mouth curled as she remembered the way Narcissa had squirmed beneath her touch: the arch of her back and the bucking of her hips as she found her most sensitive spots. She knew every single one and could find them with her eyes shut, like it was as instinctual and as habitual as breathing. She would devour her given half the chance.

“Sorry? What were you saying, Cis?” asked Lily when she realised Narcissa had been speaking to her.

“The train. It leaves in a few hours. What if we don’t make it?” she said, looking out the window across the snow-covered clearing. She hugged her elbows.

“Then we stay here. Just the two of us,” she proposed, trying to sound nochetlant but she couldn’t quite manage to hide the keen edge of hope that laced through her voice. It caught Cissa’s attention and she turned to face her.

“Now that’s tempting.” A wicked smile spread across her face and her eyes gleamed with mischief. “Imagine all the fun we could have.”

Lily laughed. “Exactly, Christmas wouldn’t be so bad here would it? We’d have the fire and there’s still food in the fridge. We could have smoked mackerel for dinner and shortbread with winterberry jam for pudding. What do you say?”

This drew Narcissa to her, a broad smile on her face. “Now there’s a feast fit for a goddess or two,” she purred and slid back down onto the sofa next to her. She nestled in close, so close that Lily could smell the remnants of her perfume from the day before and the floral shampoo she liked to use. “Beats going to the Malfoy’s Christmas ball.”

Lily didn’t want to let Narcissa get close again but the softness of her warmth was so appealing and every time she flashed that wicked grin her way she melted. So, she decided to throw caution to the wind. They were here now. They would be here for hours to come. Why not enjoy this time? Who knew what the future held? There was a war on after all.

“Don’t your family usually host?” she inquired, setting an arm around the other girl’s shoulders out of habit and positioning herself so that Cissa could rest her head on her chest.

“Yes, we do, but . . .” She paused and Lily felt her stiffen at her side. “This year is something of a special occasion.”

Lily felt her stomach drop.

“Of course. You’re to be engaged.”

They had spoken of this before. It was common for purebloods to marry for alliance, favouring power, prestige and money over more superfluous things like love and genuine human connection. When Narcissa had first told her about the prospect of an arranged marriage, she had scoffed and told her to come back to bed. It had all seemed so far fetched at the time, as if she could ever be with anyone but her.

“Any news on who your mother has decided will restore the coveted reputation to the Most Noble and Ancient House of Black?” Her voice dripped with sarcasm and her question was needle sharp. There was a part of her, more of her than she truly cared to admit to herself, that wanted to hurt Cissa with the words, for her to know just how ridiculous she found all of it. She wanted her to know that she thought she was a fool for going through with it and a coward for not standing up to her mother. 

But it wasn’t just that, Lily knew Narcissa and so she knew that this was something that she actually wanted. She wanted it all. And if she wanted it then she would get it.

“Rumour has it she’s been courting the Malfoys and their son Lucius,” she continued, choosing to ignore the jab. “Do you remember him? Few years above us. Very blonde.”

“You’re very blonde,” she pointed out, digging her fingers into Cissa’s ribs and pulling her closer when she squirmed further into her side, allowing herself to revel in the delicious chimes of her laughter.

“That’s beside the point and you know it,” she giggled, swatting at Lily’s chest before she continued, “Well, if the rumours are true then he is to be my betrothed.”

“Lucius Malfoy,” Lily chewed over his name, drawing it out, testing to see how it sounded in her mouth. “Wasn’t he a bit of a prick?”

This earned her one of Narcissa’s very sharp elbows to the ribs.

“He’s not so bad. I’ve known him since I was a child and he’s always been kind.” Lily rolled her eyes.

“Kind doesn’t exactly send a thrill of excitement running through your veins does it.” Unlike her, she wanted to add.

“Kind is better than cruel.”

She had a point there. Would Lily be able to live if she knew that Narcissa was trapped in a cruel marriage devoid of tenderness? No, she reasoned, she probably couldn’t. It was unthinkable. If there was one thing she deserved, it was happiness and if Malfoy was the one who would give it to her, then so be it.

They were silent for a moment, the only sounds were those of the fire and the creaking sigh of the old timbers adjusting under the weight of the snow. Beyond this room, nothing existed. The snow dampened everything else. 

“Could you love him?” she asked eventually, because she had to know. 

“Perhaps,” Narcissa admitted, her voice low and soft, girlish and lacking in her usual confidence. “With time.”   
  


“Could you love him more than me?” It was a selfish question. But she asked it before she had time to think, without considering the consequences. Narcissa stiffened again and looked away.

“Perhaps. With time. You’ll be hard to top.” She turned back to her, searching her eyes. She reached one hand up and brushed the hair back from Lily’s forehead, trailing her fingers down her face until she cupped her cheek. 

“Right back at you.”

In that moment, Lily meant every word. She couldn’t see her life without Narcissa. They had become so intertwined that to extract themselves from each other would surely mean death. How could she feel this way about anyone else?

“I love you, Lily.”

“I know.”

They held eye contact, unflinching and unwavering. Lily searched those star bright eyes for any doubt, any trace of a lie in what she said but found none. Narcissa’s hand was still on her cheek, tethering them together. She placed her own hand over top and turned her face to press a chaste kiss to her palm before bringing their intertwined fingers down to her lap. 

“It seems silly to say again but I wish things could be different,” murmured Cissa, gazing longingly at their hands.

Her throat felt tight, like a golf ball had lodged itself there, and treacherous heat prickled at her eyes. Lily closed her eyes and took a deep breath, trying not to let the sudden rush of emotion overwhelm her.

“I know,” she said once she had wrestled her emotions back under control. “I love you but loving you means loving your family. It means loving all that history and tradition, the glory, the grandeur, the pomp and ceremony. It means loving a whole lot more than just you. And I--” Lily’s voice cracked under the strain. “-- I would love you and all that comes with you in a heartbeat if it meant that all that comes with you could love me back for who I am, dirty blood and all.”

She spoke slowly, carefully, like she was daring to cross an icy pond and she didn’t know where the thin patches were and she had to test each step with her toe before committing to the step. Narcissa’s eyes burned silently into her but she couldn’t meet them this time. Instead, she clung to her hand.

“It’s not fair.”

“No. But let’s enjoy this time we have now. See if anyone comes to break us out of our icy prison, eh?” she said, trying to lighten the mood. 

This time, when their eyes found each other, Lily let herself fall into the kiss that was always waiting for her. Cissa’s lips were sweet, searing and insistent. Was this against her better judgement? Probably. But if they were together for now, then let them be together in all the ways that mattered. Body and soul, she would give herself up over and over again if it meant she could feel Narcissa pressed against her like this once more. 

The kiss deepened. Desperate hands tangled in hair and tore at their clothes and before long they sank to the floor. Fire danced in pale orange shadows across their skin, drenching them in blissful heat. 

And that was how they passed the rest of the morning, losing themselves in one another until they were spent and panting. Bruises marked their hips and red scratches stood out against pale skin but when Professor McGonagall finally came blasting through the snow in her tartan cloak and hat, they were perfectly presentable with nary a hair out of place. Of course, she roared at them, tore them a new one for missing the train and for coming out here in a snowstorm. But it didn’t matter. With fingers linked behind their backs, they took the tirade like water off a duck’s back. They were a united front against the world.

Once they returned to the castle, McGonagall escorted them to her office where their trunks were already waiting in front of the fireplace.

“Merry Christmas, Lily,” said Narcissa as McGonagall prepared the Floo Powder. 

“Merry Christmas, Narcissa,” Lily replied and they finally dropped their hands. 

The whole way down from the lodge, they had been tethered to one another, always staying in the other’s orbit. Every time they had parted since that fateful day in May, Lily had been convinced it was the last time and every time she had been proved wrong. They found their way back to one another each and every time, fitting together like puzzle pieces. There had been some link between them refused to break. Except now that link had shattered and Lily knew that this time it really was the end. By the time the new term began she would belong to someone else and Lily’s claim to her would be reduced to ash. 

McGonagall still had her back to them and Narcissa flashed her blinding smile. She darted forward, grabbing Lily by the chin and sweeping her into a close, quick kiss that nipped at her bottom lip. It left her breathless and she felt the tug of Narcissa’s gravity pulling at her but she remained still when they parted. 

“I love you, darling. I always will,” Cissa whispered in her ear, breath hot, words heavy with meaning. 

And then, before Lily could say anything in return, she was turning from her and striding towards McGonagall, to the fireplace and her future without Lily Evans by her side. She watched her go with dry eyes. This was how it had to be. This was war. This was the world they lived in and Lily had made her peace with that but Merlin, that didn’t make it hurt any less. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! This was written for @hogwartsonline's Holiday OWLs event and was based on the prompt "Locked in because of a snowstorm, possibly after a first date or one-night stand" and unlike last time I stayed pretty true to it!
> 
> Find me at my main blog on tumblr @martelldoran.
> 
> And, I now have a writeblr! Find me @libellules.


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